273 Comments

Nothing is more real than death! I visited my beautiful neighbor last Tuesday and he was going into hospice Thursday. I did not want to breakdown in front of him. I got to tell him I loved him, kiss his hands and tell him I wanted peace for him. Than he unexpectedly gives me a gift saying “wherever I go I bring the light”. I left soon after, sat down in reception area and sobbed my heartfelt grief. So grateful I got to be with him and give and receive the gift of love.

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So lovely, Sherri. Isn’t it amazingly humbling to receive the blessing of one so close to death’s door? How good of you to send your friend off with your love and friendship in hand.

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Bless you Jacqueline

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Not everyone has the ability to face and to hold the hands of someone who is dying. The gift you gave one another goes beyond words, dear Sherri. ❤️🌹❤️

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❤️🙏

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It is wonderful you had that moment with him. And the beauty of the gift he gave to you❤️

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So amazingly beautiful

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What a gift you gave to him and him to you💗

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Thank you Debbie.

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Long black car is coming...is coming...is coming for my husband. But on this day the blessings of so much love and tender moments lift us up. The beauty is razor sharp as my husband is so aware of the passing of time, "12 weeks becomes 11 weeks so quickly," he says, referring to the estimate of time he has been given. We drink our coffee side by side on this Easter morning, and watch this day unfold with treasures upon treasures, returned to you because you loved. My brother came and set up a TV for my husband in the bedroom, to help him get through the night when he couldn't sleep. He ended up kneeling beside my husband, holding his hand and telling Dennis all the ways that he brought meaning to his life. They both cried and expressed their love for each other.

Our simple little Easter dinner tasted especially delicious today.

So many laughs and love shared with my sister, her pregnant daughter and son-in-law, as we shared dessert together.

The kick from the baby stirring in my niece's belly. The baby my husband will more than likely, not meet in person. A tender moment as my husband placed his hand and felt the presence of new life waiting to enter and have a go at this thing called life.

Love returning love,

Around and around we go,

So beautiful, heartbreaking and bittersweet this life is. So alive each moment is when you are preparing to say goodbye.

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Poignant is maybe the word, though beautiful comes to mind. I'm reading Susan Cain's Bittersweet: How Sorrow and Longing Make Us Whole and I think you've summed it up. Holding you and your family in my heart.

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Thank you Ilene. It's nice to have a place to share the beauty and the sorrows of life. My family is too close and attached to share with sometimes.

Bittersweet is such a beautiful book! I really resonated with Susan Cain's stories and perspective. 💜

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Blessings

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I had the difficult fortune of saying goodbye to a father figure in hospice last summer, a first for me. It helped me so much to think of the Buddhist belief that the soul continues to journey forward, and to lean into comfort and curiosity for how his essence, or his light, would manifest once it had left the body. I hope that your neighbor’s hospice is comfortable and peaceful. It sounds like he has lit a lovely light in your life at an unexpected moment :)

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Yes Eleanor. A lovely light

Sherri

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It's a blessing every time we can be real with someone. Such a gift to tell him goodbye and share your love.

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Thank you Jeannine. It was so challenging but I so wanted to be there for him

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I'm glad you were able to- you'll never regret it, I know from experience ❤️

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Thank you Jeannine

Sherri

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🪶❤️

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Sherri, I only "know" you from here, but you DO bring the light. I'm glad someone had the good sense to tell you and give you that incredible gift. What a lovely neighbor.

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Ilene bless you. Sherri

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So beautiful and meaningful for both of you Sherri!

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What a lovely way to begin Easter Morn as well as the 4th Anniversary of Isolation Journals. Thank you. It’s been a tough week on a few counts: a sixth visit to a hospital since Jan. 1, because on a night out from autoimmune disease rehab, at a fancy restaurant no less, I had a total esophageal blockage on my first bite of lobster bisque with lobster bits. But my friends stuck with me through four hours of ER waiting room agony. I’ve learned my immunotherapy evoked vasculitis has probably spread to my throat. But MDAnderson will look into it in a week when I’m back out there. My daughter’s surgeons’ office was supposed to call Friday to tell me when my impaired and complicated child can have major sinus surgery to relieve a terrible long-covid respiratory condition. But it WILL eventuslly be scheduled and at least we have a plan.

So often the “yes, buts” come as a warning. But they have come as grace notes this week. I am

being well cared for in rehab by remarkable nurses and staff. My daughter’s job coach visited and shared her transcendent experience of being in the general admission front row at the Tabernacle when Jon performed. (Naw, I’m not jealous!) Other friends have come by with boiled custard and flowers. And one bore a huge arrangement of big ole New Orleans-style azaleas that I’ll plan to paint today.

I’ve have two inspired ideas this week which were so strong I’m certain they were from the universe or The Holy Spirit. (Choose whatever term you like. I personally feel close to the Heaven Descended Dove and call it Dovey.). I’m

acting on them.

And LSU is still in the NCAA tournament.

What’s not to be thankful for?

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Wishing you a speedy recovery!

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Thank you so much, Abby. Between the Mesothelioma and the immunotherapy evoked autoimmune responses, this may be a long slog. But I’m well taken care of and managing to enjoy life (and find humor in the indignities) along the way.

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Humor is everything! Wishing the best, timely outcomes for you and your child.

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Thank you so much, Eleanor. And to think: my fourth grade teacher wrote on my report card “Christine must learn that everything is not a joke.”

That’s where Mrs. Kleinpeter was wrong!!! It’s what gets me through!

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You're acting on them. ❤️

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Through all this you see the beauty. Bless you.

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Sending you healing thoughts from Austin. Sounds like we are near enough neighbors.

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Thank you, Eavan. I live primarily in Atlanta, and whenever I can in New Orleans. But I certainly welcome the opportunity to be treated at MDAnderson. They are beyond wonderful.

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Ah very good. I will be at a conference in New Orleans in May. We may overlap!

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It’s such a pleasure to be a part of this community, and it was and still is a huge honour to have written a prompt here too - to read everyone’s responses was an experience that will always stay with me. I also sometimes just have to drop out, perhaps without the time or capacity to tune in, but knowing that this community is here is so reassuring, and a constant source of inspiration. As for my blessings; after a few weeks of being very unwell, reading this with my cat stretched across me purring, a quiet Sunday morning and appreciation for the simple fact of being safe right now, when so many aren’t ❤️

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I woke up this morning (at 2 AM) and thought, "It's Easter!" I had felt sad that it was almost Easter just last week. I thought back to childhood and coloring Easter eggs, the Easter bunny, the baskets, the marshmallow chicks. And I thought of our celebrations once I had my own children. Then I thought of the years I attended church (beginning at twenty-four after losing my brother), and how it made it so meaningful to add a church service to the rest of it...gathering with friends. But now, my children are all grown and scattered around the country with families of their own adding their own traditions to the day. We no longer attend a church after it seemed to us to go off the rails and we couldn't relate any longer, and here we are...two people from very different backgrounds with nothing to do on Easter (it seemed). Then I got two calls...one from new (ish) neighbors who invited us up to color Easter eggs (just for the fun of it!) and another from friends for brunch out. I had the thought, "I'm being watched over." And I so agree with Tamzin here...it IS such a pleasure to be part of this community. I feel such a connection in this place.

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Gosh Linda, your childhood was mine too; going to Mass in new Mary Jane's, the Easter eggs, the baskets, coloring eggs.... I also felt sad with Easter approaching - All my life we always hosted a brunch or dinner or went to family or friends'. My current life holds none of that. Like you, (though I'm one person now), suddenly I found myself with nothing to do on Easter. My son is going to his girlfriends'... - What a sobering reckoning that was. After digesting this reality, I decided to color some Easter eggs - I had put on the soundtrack to The Woman King and had a veritable ball. I went to town on striving for natural tones; experimented with rubbing some oil on areas, so it swirled the colors and made them shine -almost too pretty to eat. Talk about a pivot and a lifeline. Made two dozen. I have also made plans to brunch with a very old, very dear friend who's alone and healing from a minor procedure. She's 88 and frail. I will cook up a small feast and bundle up the works, topping off with chocolate bunnies and apricot parrot tulips, bringing it all to her; doing Easter this way- Suleika is right; survival is a creative act.

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That made me tear up. I'm so happy you did that! As I sat coloring those eggs with our neighbors, I thought about all the creative ways there are to color Easter eggs and I mentioned doing that again next year and coming up with some new ideas. There we sat with our sixty-plus-year-old friends and our other new friends who are in their 70s and 80s and we all had so much fun. Would I rather be celebrating Easter with a dinner with my family? Of course, but this was consolation of the best sort. I'm with you, Suleika is right: "survival is a creative act."

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You made me chuckle about the sober reckoning. I wrote about our son getting engaged this week. He is a 9 hour drive from us and so not quite the opportunity for a celebratory drink with them. And they have been very quiet. My husband jolted me in to reality by telling me we are now an abstraction for him and he is headed on his own path and moving out fast! One minute you are doing an Easter egg hunt with them and the then “poof”, they are all grown up!

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As my priest told me once, everything we do for our children is to prepare them to leave us. So unfair!!!! 😁 And, the truth is, as a parent, nothing really prepares us for their departure. I’ve been feathering my empty nest for years, hoping to fill it with new dreams of my own. It’s been very slow. I am, though, a mother at heart. I just am. May you and your husband raise a glass to

your son and to the new life you obviously helped him dream. Bravo!

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Jacqueline, a priest once told my mother the same thing and she made sure to tell me!

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It is a sober reckoning indeed.

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Isn't that that the truth, sister.🥹

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Your creativity in dealing with your situation is beautiful and inspiring. I'll hold that in my heart when the grief feels like too much, to realize there are ways to feel better if we can use our creative spirit. And how interesting that your childhood memories of Easter are the same as mine (Mass and Mary Janes)!

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To be watched over, to know snd feel that somehow your lonely heart has been felt by others, that those hearts reached out, now that is a Blessing. All the “ things” in the world, the successes, the accolades, the wealth, can not heal

loneliness. Only kindness can do that! I’m so happy you had an opportunity to receive this blessing. You blessed the givers, too!!

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Thank you so much, Jacqueline.

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Your comment, “We no longer attend a church after it seemed to us to go off the rails and we couldn't relate any longer” resonates with me this morning. Sitting here on Easter morning, I do feel as if something is missing. We, too, once spent Easter morning with Easter baskets, egg hunts, and church. Now that my children are grown-ish (who in their 20s is grown?) we don’t have those traditions, and that sense of a church community is gone, too. But the blessings abound, and as I listen to the sounds of my husband making rolls in the kitchen, and I reflect on the hour long conversation with my daughter last night as she returned from her first solo European adventure, the sun is shining, the light reflecting across the room. You can find the Spirit wherever you are, and I realize, this is the only community I need.

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Yes...I used to think people cannot make "real" friends online but I have found over the years that I have done a 180 on that attitude. I LOVE talking to people like you. Have a very blessed Easter. I know you are.

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Love that you found new traditions. All sounds delightful. We too are empty nesters and nowhere near “home”. But will go to mass today and find a fabulous coffee afterwards and make it our own

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Funny enough, that’s how I remember Easter too. My mother taking me shopping for my outfit, spring coat and bonnet and of course, white patent leather Mary Janes. I was looking at the old photos just yesterday. Have a lovely and blessed day.

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Last year we spent Easter with family including a terminally member. I couldn't remember the last time I was on the balmy West coast...perhaps a decade? Our cousin proudly hosted a meal as I needed a score card to keep track of the next generation of Chans and Wongs. Life and its moments are precious as I got to meet long time friend's large Mennonite family with all the aunts and uncle at Easter in another city. It was fun to meet them hearing their stories, dreams, and jokes. Grateful I have the time and opportunity to come together and visit.

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I was missing out past family Easter parties, when the kids were little and so fun. Like my family is far away but I spent a quiet day.

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I woke up at my cousin’s home in Germany, to a houseful of kids hunting for Easter eggs. Now they’re all wired on chocolate and it’s bedlam and I’m loving every minute of it! Happy Anniversary to this community and Happy Easter to those that celebrate! 🌹🐣

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Sounds delightful

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Such a lovely post and prompt. I’m struck by the beauty in human resilience and to look how far we’ve all come! I have a daily gratitude practice where I count six blessings, which got me through three years of debilitating long Covid, residual grief from loosing two babies and my marriage years ago, and all the other life crap that happens. It really keeps me sane and happy as I can be. I also like to secretly send moody, rude people love, they are probably doing the best they can. Thank you for this! 🪷

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Gratitude is so powerful. I love your daily practice.

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Thanks Abby. It’s so easy yet do effective ✨💛

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It’s a practice I’m familiar with! My Substack is named for my own practice.

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How lovely! 💛✨💛

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Love your last comment! How healing that is to send them love.

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I was born and spent most of my childhood in Bangladesh, where there aren’t four distinct seasons. So seeing seasons change, but especially witnessing the death-to-life transition from winter to spring, is astonishing—even after years of living in four-season climates. I also love Isolation Journals because of the joy and kindness it spreads. ♥️

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❤️❤️❤️

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I can still laugh (and I'm heavy into the grief of Mom dying)..and my little students say things every school day that make me roll in the sublime silly. They are little sage people, like Yoda. "Ms. Night (they have all shortened my name), this is my stuffy." I asked, "Oh, it's fabulous. Have you named it?" My little student paused and then said, "Duckus." I laughed so hard and said, "Best name ever!!!" I am not a user of the word "blessing." That's okay. I'm just happy to be here amongst others sharing.

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Mary, thinking of you and holding you closely in my heart as you grieve the passing of your dear Mom. Sending you love.

The “sublime silly” of children is magical and joyful. I am a former educator after an amazing long career with young children. The joy they brought to me still resonates in my heart to this day. I can tell you love the children, Ms. Night 🥰. Take care.

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Thank you, Mary! I love that you too were in the "sublime silly." May we all share in that.

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Children really do bless us. I just love your words, “ sublime silly”! (I understand your grief, Mary. I miss my mother every day, and it’s been over thirty years since she died. Your heart has been changed by this loss and in a way, that’s a blessing, too. In the place your mother held in your life, new things will grow. And you will be ok.)❤️

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Jaqueline, you are a giver of kindness and hope. Thank you.

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Sending so much love for you, Mary, as you grieve your Mom. How lovely that you can still find such delight in your little students. I’ve always found small, joyful children the most soothing balm in periods of losses and grief. ♥️

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Thank you, Karen. Yes! They are bundles of pureness and light.

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I woke this morning to hear a kayak being gently pulled over stones to the edge of the lake. I rolled over in my sleeping bag and peered out to see a young boy off for a sunrise paddle. The grandeur of the mountains surrounding our small campsite in the alps of the South Island roused me from my bed and I dressed quickly and headed off for a walk. Yesterday I rode my bike for three hours along tracks foreign to me, but I felt at ease. I am blessed to be able to take trips into these ancient valleys and towering mountains, I feel they hold a wisdom that must be experienced to be absorbed. I am blessed to have returned this afternoon from a couple of days adventuring under my own power — walking, biking, swimming. I am blessed to travel safely alone to remote campsites. I am blessed to have been shown how to appreciate the land. I am blessed to have friends and family to share stories from adventures with. I am blessed to be able to turn to mountains and waterways when I am need of something to sooth my soul. And I am blessed to have space to share my musings here, and most importantly blessed to have a community of people so open to sharing their stories too, this collective wisdom is a gift. Aroha nui, much love.

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Gorgeous all around. ❤️

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Thank you! 💛

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Dear Kate, how beautiful the world is! You, in it, shining your light, adds blessing to my life. Yours is s joyful heart. Thank you!

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Thank you for your kind works Jacqueline! Made me smile wide, aroha nui 💛

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Can I join you? This setting sounds divine

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For sure, NZ loves visitors to its beautiful places ☀️🌱

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Your Friday gratitude caused me to remind my husband that NZ is on my list. So instead of Copenhagen for my 60th next year, it might be NZ. We like to hike and figure NZ might be better for our "younger" selves and we go to Copenhagen when we're 60+. Keep that inspiration coming!

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Congrats on 60 next year, that’s so exciting! Every year we get to grow older is a privilege. So cool to hear NZ is on your bucket list, if you need any advice or have any questions feel free to flick me a message. Thanks for your kind message 😊

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Now it makes sense!! NZ looks amazing in pics. Still on the old bucket list

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Thank you for another wonderful prompt. I look forward to each Friday and Sunday because of the Isolation Journals. Mavis is right. There is always, always, always something to be grateful for. Even if it’s as simple as breathing. I struggle with depression and I can easily turn into a Nah Nah! This space has become a beacon for me. I’m so grateful for hearing Jon’s Grammy acceptance because it woke something in me, which led me to Suleika. I try to read as many responses as I can. Sometimes I only comment with a heart emoji because the words don’t come. But I care! I really do care! The Isolation Journals is a place to feel human again. Thank you for this space. I love you all.❤️🪶

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❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️….shall I go on? ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️…you know what I’m saying, right? ❤️❤️❤️❤️ You are loved!

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We know you really do care, Laurie. Never doubt that. ❤️

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I look for your posts Laurie, if I remember correctly you are from MA too. Happy Sunday!

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Connecticut. I’m in Ct. thank you for your kind words.

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Close enough! ❤️

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Hello Suleika and company, I’m a sporadic participant in this process, but thankful and amazed with it, just the same. Last night as I was making dumplings with my partner and our daughter Suzanna, home from Vancouver for Easter. I noticed there was no music. Suzanna got right on her phone, playing some music to cook by. It felt good, nothing I recognized, just soft and soothing. I said what did you search on Spotify? She said this is my cooking playlist, I made it and labelled it…cooking. My goodness I loved her choices and we enjoyed the dumplings, experimenting with many parts of putting them together, straying from the recipe, (using what we had), hoping our pinches would hold, trying to keep the dumplings warm in the oven so I wouldn’t be back and forth from the stove as the next batches simmered. Now today is Easter and we’ll be cooking together again. I don’t know, I just wanted to appreciate this with you. Our dumplings were delicious in the end, and we ate heartily together.

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A lovely scene. Thank you for allowing us to appreciate it with you. ❤️

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Cooking and good music❤️ Reminds me of my in-law’s home filled with Sinatra and my mother in law

Making the deepest dish lasagne - great memories. And lots of laughter

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I think I’ll start my own cooking playlist. And I’ll slip in Sinatra in honour of your mom-in-law.

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Cooking playlists are the best. I always learn so much from my daughter! Happy Easter

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Happy Easter to you too!

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I think blessings are contagious. We need them to counter the effects of adversity. At the end of 2020 , I set up a Caring Bridge to keep updates on my newly diagnosed AML away from the busyness and noise of many social media platforms. To my surprise, not only did friends and acquaintances respond, they did so with huge amounts of love, thought, care, wit and wisdom. They shared "ordinary" photos of things in their lives which were beautiful to look at. My family were quite overwhelmed by the comments and they have been a source of strength for all of us. Never underestimate the power of a kind thought or smile, written or verbal or even heard in birdsong.

Thanks to the Isolation Journals community for another source of support, interest and sharing of hearts and minds. On that note, I'll now get up and welcome the new day and eat porridge - my daily breakfast blessing. xxx

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Love a good porridge!

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❤️❤️❤️

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As the birds sing in this day, I am reminded of a brief sentence that I was given in a small plaque years ago. It didn’t include an attribution of any kind. I learned a few years later that it is a sentence in a verse from II Corinthians. “Behold, all things have become new.” In this season of my life and in this Spring Easter Sunday morning, as I await the sunrise above the distant mountains, I appreciate this sentence so much. It is a wonderful reminder of the possibilities that await in each moment of each day, with each breath. I appreciate the calm sense of peace and beauty that I find here. This is one of a very few places I can feel alive and safe from the sullied world of social media and I am forever grateful that I found this…or that The Isolation Journals found me. 🙏🏻 Sendjng blessings to this community and beyond.

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Yes! Gave up social media a month ago and the peace and calm is divine and so this is my community of connection now

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Fridays are even sweeter seeing everyone’s joys! ❤️

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I took a break from reading The Isolation Journal posts on Sundays but I am so glad I chose today to join back in to this community. Blessings contagion— what a beautiful thing! Thank you, Suleika and Mavis, for the reminders and for the writing/thinking prompt. I feel blessed to have a husband who tells me each day that I look beautiful (which, trust me, is not usually the case). I have two dear sons, one who calls to chat regularly, and one who’d rather send a text here and there, but keeps in touch just the same. I have an 87 year old mom and an 82 year old mother-in-law, both sharp minded and both pretty good with their iPhones as long as there’s a stylus nearby. I have many sweet friends and also a best friend I’ve known since first grade with whom I speak daily despite the many miles between us. Some late afternoons, we each pour a glass of wine and have happy hour together over the phone. I have good people in my life.

Truth be told, sometimes the aforementioned folks drive me crazy. Some days I feel disappointed or annoyed by one or another. I probably complain too much when this happens. I probably complain too much in general. But these people are my blessings, my loves and my life.

Again, thank you, Suleika and Mavis, for the reminders. May you feel the blessings contagion ripple in your direction.

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Haha!! I think it is the nature of those we love to both bless us and drive us mad!! In the end, love wins. ❤️

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Welcome back, Jill 🌷

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Two days ago, a close friend shared that someone we both loved was gone. Distance and complexity separated us for decades. Yet, our last meeting was powerfully positive. We moved on, as hopefully one does-destiny...I am sad that they left and I had no idea of their struggle. Yet, that we were able to resolve with affection and honesty is a blessing. Not all pages end so well nor should they-- however- we were of the best intentions with a mismatch too great --rest well poet, your words continue to inspire and if I listen- "I shall call the pebble Dare"

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So sorry for your loss Mae

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