This is beautiful, Mary. Loss of loved ones runs deep. Your sign of the cardinal just made me think of when I was sitting on a close friend’s porch in the summer of 2021 and two cardinals flew into a tree near us. We had both lost our fathers a short time before and upon seeing the cardinals, my friend said to me, “Look, Suse. Our dads are checking in with us.”
Oh, how lovely! Susan, I am so sorry for the sorry loss of your father and also so comforted by you and your friend sharing in the grief, side by side, and then...they appeared. to "check in with us." Thank you for sharing this personal memory.
Let this be the moment of remembering. Oh dear son , steve, you came each day, while I was recovering in a mental hospital. You were only 18 at the time, and as scared as you were, you never showed it! You were a rock to me! Because it was hard for me to swallow you would bring me boxes and boxes of multi colored life savers to relieve some of my distress in just swallowing. Just having you seated beside me were beautiful moments of love! It’s these situations to teach me to live in the moment. I was scared but determined to get well so I could once again be there for others, like my beautiful son, Stephen. Love you fire et my darling son!
So many tears from this reflection. Thank you for such a deep sharing. Researchers say that heartbreak changes the actual shape of your heart.... if so my heart will only have a shadow of resemblance to the form of when I was born. So many beautiful and deeply painful moments have massaged, kneaded and chipped away to reveal its purpose.....beyond its beating.
To Evan. The day everything changed shape. Let this be a moment of remembering when your birth came the same day leukemia was diagnosed in me. We share May 10. May your arrival eclipse leukemia’s forever.
To you too! On this day, a day when I am fighting to get my meds approved! I know you understand the bureaucratic maze that is cancer drugs and specialty pharma!
With great gratitude and love everlasting, “let this be a moment of remembering,” This hour, this reading, the memories and other thoughts this reading evokes.
Valentine’s Day is also a memorable anniversary for me. February 14, 1992, my very first chemo treatment. Since then I have lived a full life of hills and valleys, with two more cancer diagnoses, divorce, remarriage, and many beautiful moments of a full life. Gratitude fills me with endless energy for healing and determination. Thank you Susu for sharing your life with us. May your days be filled with more cheerful walks with your loves. ❤️
Suleika: I have a biopsy this week as well. Facing the “scanxiety” if it is now a bit easier as I imagine going through it with you. Let this be a moment of remembering. We are never alone, always connected, ever grateful for the gift of breath. xoxo
Let this be a moment of remembering " love sent " - I never was a big "I LOVE YOU" sort of guy and over the decades, I found myself getting better and better at it depending on who I was with. Being from the Archie Bunker era, saying those words, even to the people I loved tended to be hard. These days, at the end of a given text, to those special in my life, this is what you receive. Not I love you, not kissy kissy hearts all over some emoji face, not even a heart emoji. "Love sent" at the end of my text is a description of my best ability to show you my love for you. Maybe tomorrow I will begin the process of digging a little deeper.
Oh, and no poem for me, just - The only way I can help and love others, is to make sure I help and love myself first!!!
"Let this be a moment of remembering"
When it sunk in that, I would never see you again.
You were gone.
And let me also remember when I realized and accepted the undeniable shift inside me
when I realized that you visit me.
You come to me as a cardinal. Just as you fed them each day when you were here on Earth.
I don't need to look for a message because the message is there:
I love you eternally,
I watch over you,
I want you to live, expand past your self-imposed limits, and I will be there too.
Love this, Mary! Remembering... makes so much sense, even when painful. For it is rememberingo that eventually warms the heart.
Thank you, Sandra. It is ironic that the remembrance (of the deep sadness and grief) "eventually warms the heart." You put that so well.
This is beautiful, Mary. Loss of loved ones runs deep. Your sign of the cardinal just made me think of when I was sitting on a close friend’s porch in the summer of 2021 and two cardinals flew into a tree near us. We had both lost our fathers a short time before and upon seeing the cardinals, my friend said to me, “Look, Suse. Our dads are checking in with us.”
Oh, how lovely! Susan, I am so sorry for the sorry loss of your father and also so comforted by you and your friend sharing in the grief, side by side, and then...they appeared. to "check in with us." Thank you for sharing this personal memory.
This is lovely. I know deep loss, and this brought a softening today. Thank you.
This is so beautiful.
Thank you, Laurie. Your kind words mean so much.
Always Mary. I love what you write.❤️
Oh, now that brought a tear to my eye. Seriously. I was having a rough day, and your kindness has made my burden a bit lighter.
❤️
Beautiful..
I too have a piece that I am sharing, do have a look.. in your spare time.
Something different, something magical, something that expresses visually and caligraphically.
https://kallolpoetry.substack.com/p/rootless-existence-a-dissection-through
So beautiful ❤
Let this be the moment of remembering. Oh dear son , steve, you came each day, while I was recovering in a mental hospital. You were only 18 at the time, and as scared as you were, you never showed it! You were a rock to me! Because it was hard for me to swallow you would bring me boxes and boxes of multi colored life savers to relieve some of my distress in just swallowing. Just having you seated beside me were beautiful moments of love! It’s these situations to teach me to live in the moment. I was scared but determined to get well so I could once again be there for others, like my beautiful son, Stephen. Love you fire et my darling son!
❤️❤️❤️
❤️
So many tears from this reflection. Thank you for such a deep sharing. Researchers say that heartbreak changes the actual shape of your heart.... if so my heart will only have a shadow of resemblance to the form of when I was born. So many beautiful and deeply painful moments have massaged, kneaded and chipped away to reveal its purpose.....beyond its beating.
♥️♥️♥️
There’s a poem here, Erica.
I have pages of notes and scribbles over past few years and need to explore why I feel so scared to just sit and write! Thank you for the push !
You’re almost there on this one!❤️
Awwwww okay I’m going to
Go for it. Everyone here is giving me the courage to give it a go!
You have the writing in you!
Thank you for the support!
This is already a poem.❤️💕
❤️❤️❤️
Thank you I will gather up some courage to write more❤️
🥲
Let this be a moment of remembering
A tiny voice
As if an infant
But not
Love is in many forms
Mine a tiny flower of a pup
Crossed the bridge
Sending love ♥️
To Evan. The day everything changed shape. Let this be a moment of remembering when your birth came the same day leukemia was diagnosed in me. We share May 10. May your arrival eclipse leukemia’s forever.
To you too! On this day, a day when I am fighting to get my meds approved! I know you understand the bureaucratic maze that is cancer drugs and specialty pharma!
Let this be a moment of remembering
the moment this week when your message dropped, that feeling.
'I'm coming to see you"
my heartbeat shot up
my soul soared
and you set me on fire
New Boy, 1974
"Let this be a moment of Remembering"
Art class, intro to pottery to be specific
my first words to you
“I really like your pinch pot,”
Nyack embellished on your t-shirt.
You were shy
I, even more so
Another year goes by
I can hardly utter a word to you.
Four years of waiting to see you
Walking into the cafeteria
Or an art class
The library, where we both worked.
Rare moments of intersection
A shared car ride
A few more words
A near collision in the long jump pit.
Senior year,
I asked for a dance
You said yes
Of course you would.
You are gone now.
But the love is only repackaged
Into my tears
Of your memory.
For Paul.
Stunning. Oh, that love, I have known it in my life. Your writing brought it all back to me.
With great gratitude and love everlasting, “let this be a moment of remembering,” This hour, this reading, the memories and other thoughts this reading evokes.
The reverberations begetting more reverberations ♥️♥️♥️
Let this be a moment of remembering
How our eyes met and our hearts cracked
Our eyes wide with everlasting possibility
Possibilities we never thought would be ours
As we look back on the simplest of moments
An innocence we didn’t know we had.
The quiet times when we didn’t know where we were going or if we would make it to the other side
I remember the doubt and the fear
And I thank it now, as it’s been the pillar and center of everything pulling us closer and closer…
A closeness I know neither of us saw coming and a fullness I know we think we know now but have so much more yet to come.
Grateful I am for the man and woman we have become.
Let this be a moment of remembering
We are always beginning.
I will always love beginning with you.
Valentine’s Day is also a memorable anniversary for me. February 14, 1992, my very first chemo treatment. Since then I have lived a full life of hills and valleys, with two more cancer diagnoses, divorce, remarriage, and many beautiful moments of a full life. Gratitude fills me with endless energy for healing and determination. Thank you Susu for sharing your life with us. May your days be filled with more cheerful walks with your loves. ❤️
Dear Suleika
Congratulations.
Tears of joy for you.
And, "the moment I turned to my sweet pup and said out loud, “We’re outside and we’re living.” It was so simple, but it felt like a revelation."
How soul enlarging and filling.
Sending you all the healthy vibes,
With gratitude and profound joy,
Suleika: I have a biopsy this week as well. Facing the “scanxiety” if it is now a bit easier as I imagine going through it with you. Let this be a moment of remembering. We are never alone, always connected, ever grateful for the gift of breath. xoxo
Right back at you!
Let this be a moment of remembering " love sent " - I never was a big "I LOVE YOU" sort of guy and over the decades, I found myself getting better and better at it depending on who I was with. Being from the Archie Bunker era, saying those words, even to the people I loved tended to be hard. These days, at the end of a given text, to those special in my life, this is what you receive. Not I love you, not kissy kissy hearts all over some emoji face, not even a heart emoji. "Love sent" at the end of my text is a description of my best ability to show you my love for you. Maybe tomorrow I will begin the process of digging a little deeper.
Oh, and no poem for me, just - The only way I can help and love others, is to make sure I help and love myself first!!!
The heart is not a charm. It’s a muscle pump moment by moment taking us into new territory. Thank you for this beautiful post.
Let this be a moment of remembering
The bitter ends of our pasts
Collapsing and falling into place
For the tides of spring to wash us away
Where we are meant to be
Together is a place we come to celebrate
The love that feels boundless
Let this be a moment of remembering
That love is your existence itself
And I want to deeply cherish your each breath
Let us be nourished by our tenderness
How many times was I crestfallen?
Yet I keep coming back for more
Just a little more of that sweetness
And I say to myself- but you are a manifestation of love that feels greater than the universe itself
Can I be greedy for wanting the love that makes one feel complete?
Let this be a moment of remembering
That love is only felt and never measured
Standing on the cliff
about to leap
into the unknown
of chemo.
Is it a blessing
or a betrayal?
Let this be
a moment of remembering
a marking of the moment
before the plunge
This is me
untouched
Being
Laughing
Curious
Walking the double edged sword
between
thinking
maybe I understand
knowing I don't
can't
fathom the unknown
Feeling the mystery
and horror of it all at one
Wondering will I be washed away
by the chemicals
or will I journey
to the edge
and come back
with gifts to share
This is
my life
calling to itself
I do not want to simply survive
I want to thrive.
❤️❤️❤️❤️